Project 3
Dear future self,
As you probably remember, this semester has not been an easy journey. It was quite an adjustment going from the small Old Orchard Beach High School of about 200 kids to the University of New England filled with over 10,000 students. The most difficult time during this whole transition was the first few weeks of classes. Being in a completely new environment surrounded by people I’ve never met turned out to be more stressful than I had expected. I quickly found myself getting overwhelmed by many things: What if I get lost and can’t find my classes? What if I can’t keep up with the work and end up failing a class? How am I going to find time to balance work, spending time with friends and family, and school? Am I going to fall behind because I haven’t decided on a major yet? Despite all of these questions constantly racing through my head during these first weeks, I knew that I just had to tough it out and my stress would eventually subside with time. And that is exactly what happened. As I started to get more familiar with the campus, make a schedule for myself each week in my planner, and meet new people here, I began to get more comfortable and a lot of the things I was nervous about going into college no longer clouded my mind.
While the initial stressors of transitioning to college mostly went away towards the end of September, there was still one question that wouldn’t seem to leave my thoughts: What if I can’t keep up with the work and end up failing a class? All throughout highschool I was a straight A student and always held myself to a very high standard when it came to school. And while those expectations for myself stayed as I entered college, the school work became much more difficult. I had known going into college that the school work would not be easy, but the combination of Covid causing a good amount of my junior year to be online and an easy schedule of classes my senior year really caused these college courses to throw me for a loop. Right around the height of my anxiety surrounding my grades and school, I was assigned a project for my creative writing poetry class. The assignment was to draft a poem of our choice over the span of a week in the format of a small book. Each page would include a new addition or revision to the poem until we reached the final product on the last page. I decided that writing this poem could be a good outlet for me to express some of these feelings I was experiencing at the time. Each day I added a new line that described how I was feeling and I ended up titling the poem ‘Overwhelmed.’ Finally, I decorated the book with sketches and images that represented the ideas in the poem to give it that final touch.
Feeling slightly defeated at this point, I knew that I just had to continue working hard to study and complete my homework. Around a week after I finished the drafty-poem project, I had a sort of turning point in my first semester experience. For my intro to environmental issues class, we had the opportunity to spend our class time visiting Ram Island, the island owned by UNE. It turned out to be a beautiful day (even though it ended up pouring during the last ten minutes of the trip), and I thought it was such a cool experience to explore the island. Going on this trip really made me realize that attending this school would provide me with such unique experiences that I would not have the opportunity to do anywhere else. I started feeling like my hard work was paying off. On the island, I snapped this picture of a monarch butterfly, which I was able to appreciate so much more as we had just learned in class that it is an endangered species. Not only was I feeling extremely grateful that I was given this opportunity, but I was noticing myself applying what I was learning about to outside of the classroom. I remember getting home that day with a smile on my face and a new, more positive, mindset going into the remainder of the semester.
From that point on, the weeks started flying by and I noticed myself improving on quizzes and being able to keep up with the majority of my homework. Each week I recorded an audio journal entry for my first year seminar class that went over all the things I did and felt that week. The first week of November was week 11 of my classes and happened to be when I met with my advisor to pick out what classes I was going to register for in the spring semester. While I didn’t, and still don’t, know what I want my major to be, I have started to get a general idea of what I’m interested in exploring. As you can hear in the audio clip, one career that has sparked my curiosity recently is journalism. I have also been very interested in sociology as a possible major as it is the major I chose to explore in project 2 of this class. For this upcoming semester, I was able to pick classes that I am truly excited about and may lead me to deciding on a major. As you are reading this letter about a year or two from now, you have already picked your major and likely have a better idea of what career path you plan on pursuing. I’m curious to know if I ultimately decide on majoring in sociology, or if that has completely changed? Nonetheless, I know that no matter how difficult this decision ends up being, I will get through it, as I have come so far already in this first semester.
Overall, this semester has been full of ups and downs but I have pushed through every difficult situation to make it to where I am now. I am really looking forward to the rest of my college experience. I am sure that new challenges will present themselves along the way, but I also know that I will get to experience new opportunities and have the chance to really explore my interests, which will continue to motivate me through all of the hard times.
